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"You know, I'm sick of following my dreams, man.
I'm just going to ask where they're going and hook up with 'em later."
-- Mitch Hedberg.

Date: summer 2009.

On a plain to iceland, as a turist. Out on a gletcher, large holes in the ice, Suddenly, a white horse's head pop's up from the hole about 50-100 meters away. Tour-guide warns us not to help the horse. Seconds later, A NASA rocket takes off from the verry same hole, assumingly burning the horse to the death.

Date: 2009-08-01

Testing to see if a coffiemaker is water-resistant. pouring milk over it. some damn foo insist on placing small bags of sand and salt next to it, to absorb the milk

Date: 2009-08-06

Wake up at 02:30 while still asleep, have to do work, but also have to sleep, all this while still asleep.

Date: 2009-08-07

So me and a mate are at a BIG cinema; many screens but no separate rooms (like one very big dark hall with furniture and cupboards as only 'walls'); he goes to take his place while I have to do something. I go to take a leak; near the (fancy) restrooms there's a guy offering me 2 cups with blobs of green and blue jelly or whatever (each in its own cup) in it; I ask "what's that difference?", he doesn't answer, so I ask some teenage kid; he says "I don't know either". I think "goodie, I'm not *that* old yet". Back to the cinema, I can't find my mate, and think what a bad move it was to leave him there like that, and hope he's ok. After all this, I'm walking the streets, alone, it's dark and I have a fold-up razorblade, I'm following some guy. After toying with it, I put the blade in my pocket to prevent nasty cuts (in myself).

Date: 2009-08-10

I am in my old (ground)school. in a long walkway/corridor. metal rods are placed about 20cm above floor level, across the corridor (about 3-4 meters wide). I am jumping like a Kangaroo from metal rod to metal rod. At the end of the about 50 meter long corridor, I reach the end, that goes into the main hall entrance, still jumping. out through the double doors and now I am in a Airport, the taxfree zone just before bording area. I am searching for a digi cam. charger for my friend who is currently in Canada, but he forgot his charger. I find none, all I can find in the taxfree area that have thick pink carpet btw. is black sony DVD players.

Date: 2009-08-12

A mate of mine yells at me "look! I got $3200 from Google ads on my page!" (at least twice). I reply "oh, good for you!", slightly jealous. Come to think of it, there was also a vast amount of girls involved, but not sure if it was the same dream or 2 separate ones.

Date: 2009-08-18

Somehow I was living in a house and got visits from evil b*stards or ghosts (I thought); like trying to make me insane, mostly at night. Acting like a true detective, I went to ask the lady who previously lived there; she too had had similar visits. I told her my story and then she cried because why oh why was this happening to us, then I said "can't you see? it's not you nor me, it's this house - they want something from this house". She had gotten as 'threat mail' a small transparent rectangle with 2 'mickey mouse ears' on top corners, and black skill below the rectangle. I remember inspecting it and reaching genius conclusion but unfortunately I cannot remember.

Date: 2009-08-23

I was at the entrance of a very small seaport in Norway, it had steep sides of black rock. out of this habour came a tiny boat. A narrator explained that seamen must be carefull when sailing the wood out (his load).

I climb up the steep walls to the top, a road between the harbor and the sea. it was at first easy to walk on the cobblestone path, but at the top it got more and more tilted and finaly went over to be steps. Finaly at the top, I saw a few ppl, that I do not know who is, walk out on the sea, on shallow watter.

SUDDENLY, I was in a prisson camp.it was in a forrest / mountain area. maybe on a island. When I first arrived, we were assigned bunks/beds (the type with 2 on top of each other) and a 2x shoebox size box for personal belongings and foodz. It was a unisex prisson camp, yet nothing sexual happend. I was very unhappy about my situation, not the fact that I had to spend 3 months in prisson, but the fact that I had to tell my father about it. Was not looking forward to that.

Apprently, I had a car on this prisson island... I drove it up to the entrance gate, some 5-6km through forrest roads, and asked kindly, if the day I arrived in the afternoon counted as one of the 90 days. The guard was very confused about this and had to look it up in several large books, all the while I tried to calm him down and say it was not THAT important.

On my way back to the barracks, a prisson transport was speeding towards me from the back, in the front of me, a larger semi with a tanker. The bastard behind me drove right up to my bumper. Tanker infront of me started to break wildly and I had to turn of the road and into the bush, I order to not become a sandwitch. Somehow the truck flipped over. Prison transport cont. on its way, speeding, while I got out to help the chap in the semi. Now the semi turned into a toy semi, I moved it back and forth on the dusty ground, telling him to drive responsably, and drove on to the camp.

Woke up in the morning a bit confused and still had the problem of how to explain my Father I was going to prison...

Date: 2009-08-27

[ BTW, last entry: damn, you sometimes scare me. ]

Some translucent Alien-like creature is following me, coming around the corner of a corridor in a building. Not really a scary persuit; it's more like an annoyance than a threat. But anyway, nice to avoid. There are some people around, and as I see him/it approach in the distance, I notice there's a DIY snackish buffet in progress. I take a white scorpion with red 'scissor' tips as snack and begin to chew on the scissor-tips; some other guy warns me the are poisonous. I tell him I know this, but that he has a point; it is very acid-tasting, and only contains exoskeleton, hardly any meat. I break off the 'scissor' and start chewing on the other end; much better.

Date: 2009-09-05

Lots of weird things, in about 4 or 5 different dreams; I remember alien invasion, with yours truly being cloned. Suddenly I found myself in the company of my primary school classmates (and my clone as well); I asked myself "what would they possibly want by doing this" (i.e. what did they want to make clear)? But after remembering Yoda's words ("ask not 'why' - there is no 'why'!") decided to let it go; perhaps it was just alien's idea of a joke, or something I couldn't understand, or at least not at that time. Also some other dream about some programming incident at work, and some other non-nice work-related stuff. I need holiday.

Date: 2009-09-05

It was the zombie apocalypse, human was slowly being overrun by extremely fast/raging zombies (not the traditional slow ones). The people still alive were fighting them of course, mostly with guns. However, before a fight started or when they were close to being overrun those people would break their own ankles. If they would indeed get overrun by zombies, they would be slow zombies due to their broken ankles. This gives the remaining survivors a better chance as they would be fighting against slow(er) zombies. Overall this dream was quite gory.

Date: 2009-09-07

I was in 1986, at what I knew would be a cold-war museum in my time. They specialized in Submarines and small trucks, the later was from the 1920's and 1930's. strangely. I inqueried about a Submarine I knew would be there, But I could not remember its name or number. They did not have it, not as a real sub, a model or on microfilm. The microfilm was not the normal kind, it looked like a laser from a CD/DVD player, and it had to be looked at under a microscope (laser not active, as it was a microfilm).

I Asked my friend, if he knew the number or name of the sub I was looking for, he did not. The leader of the place wanted to show us a truck he had, with main focus on a oil indicator glass mounted on the side of the engineblock. When we left the dark museum, it turned ot to be underground. outside it was a sunny day, not a cloud in sight, a bit windy but warm. there was grass everywhere, We, we were now more than 2, started to play frisbee with somthing that was a square and made out of rubber, it bent atleast. There was a old lady there, a grandmother but not one of mine, asking if that was the game (I forgot the name) and we all kind of laughed and said no, thats not that game :-)

I was now in a garden that was the backyard of several buildings, and the back of the garden had a forrest. At the transiston from grass to forrest, I was moving a large tractor-wheel around, pulling it as it was horisontal and filled with sand. I was looking for the perfect place to set it down, so it would not rain on it, relying on the cover of the trees. Sadly all places I tried, still had rain comming through. Got fed up with moving it, So I started meassuring how big a tarpaulin should be, to streach out between the branches of the trees, to cover my "bed". Measurements said about 2meters by 1.5 meters.

I went into one of the buildings, it was a backentrance to a resturants kitchen. There I talked abit with a rat, about the size of a small cat. it was on a shelf so we were almost face to face, it was quite friendly. Suddenly, a "Lady and the tramp" chef came (the skinny one, not the fat one). The rat instantly flee, and there was another rat and a cat aswell, all running away. Told the chef I saw a rat (did not mention I talked with it, did not want him to think I was crasy). He wanted to report it the the officials, reaching for the phone and asking me for more details. Made up a story about it not being here that I had seen it but in a house I had rented that I did not know where were now (like a rented car, the apprently move about too...) Never got to go out and buy the cover for my "bed"...

Back home, my gf. had bought a swedish mail-order fake angle-wings for good luck, they did take up alot of space in bed, she had to wear them all the time.

Date: 2009-09-15

(about last one: damn.)

Some guy to fix roof came by to look over matters; the place here was very full with furniture, no place to sit almost (I remember this living-room from real life, but how interesting is that). Light on the ceiling was broken, so it was quite dim, only evening sunlight shining in. After work was discussed, he continued by talking about his many electronics-projects he had made, in an almost apologetic way for 'wasting my time'. I didn't mind.

Also,... at some rainy market (flea market or something), there was a cardboard box with a lot of junk and a lot of records in it; all by some Japanese country-singer. A Japanese guy was going throught them, smiling. Then or later I notice a lump on my stomach, underneath my bellybotton, very swollen, and with a white worm crawling out; I try to catch the worm but it's gone again. Finally catch it, it drops on the floor. I stoop down to inspect it; almost can't believe this thing is really *alive*, but then I smash it.

Date 2009-10-15

I saw a gray-toned computerscreen, I saw it like one see the video from a videocamera filming a CRT monitor, some sync problems and semi-destored image. It showed a list, 2 rows of Amiga games, like "Oil Imperium" and "Syndicate", with the arrowkeys I fliped through the titles and selected something, dont recall what.

Date 2009-10-17

Only remember this dream partial.

It was on a gravelroad entrance to a big house in the countryside, I was picking around in the gravel and found small diamonds, milky-white and size about 5x3mm or so. As it was on another mans estate, it was ofcourse his to keep. Some days go by I think. I was at the house again, for dinner, there were 3 couples and 1 boy. the owner of the house w/wife, the daughter of the house w/boyfriend me w/gf and a young boy of the house. I notice this as the table was set. The man had been in financial problems, he had closed his bankaccount because it was empty. After dinner, he called the bank and re-opened it. I feelt the need to dial back to the bank and explain the situation, if they realy wanted him back as a costumer, as he in the past had wasted his money and now most certanly would do so again, at first they though of it as a prak-call, but I manage to get bank-lady out to the house, showing her the facts of life, how the boy of the family had been given a diamond-covered cellphone, that most likely were either broken or thrown away within the next ½ year. I showed her several other examples, and she was convinced. I told her she could not go on and have him in her bank, it would be a repeat of the financial crisis and what not. I then saw a deck on a large ferry / cruiseboat, ppl jump ship, jumping overbard into the water as if it was sinking or at fire, yet I could not see anything wrong with the ship, and we were still inside the habor (yet not at pier).

Date 2009-10-18

The misses and me was apperently out looking on a house to buy. We were at a normal one storey house, with a grass garden all the way around it and a rather large drive 2 carports, side by side with a upright between them, white-painted wood, rather large (an American would mostlikely clain it was a "four by four" (inch) but I did not bring a ruler with me, and if I did, by GOD it would be metric). A heart, made out of a thin plate of wood, was nailed to this center upright and painted white as well.

There was a couple there, 30-somthing loading there stationcar/wagon, they were moving there last stuff. We asked if we could take a look around and went into the back yard. It was a lovely day, sunny and warm, grass was very green. The house suddenly had no roof, only the wooden parts, the skeleton, no plates or tiles. Inside there was only walls seperating the beedroom from the hallway and living room (that also had a open wall towards the kitchen, very 80's), but the walls did not go all the way up to the roof, so light, sound, air was circulating the hole house, I found this very impractical.

Date 2009-10-21

I was driving close to home, when I saw a neighbours standing at the side of the road next to there car, I stoped. Then wanted to show me, that there baby had learned to walk. They sat him down and he started moving, at some point, he was getting a bit far away, across the road and towards a tunnel under the road (walk+bike only tunnel, know this from RL) And I alerted the proud parents, when I looked again, the baby had turned into a rather large car wheel, jumping happy towards the tunnel.

Date 2009-12-05

I was at work, where, after I had kindly suggested it would be a good debugging-tool, an original Nintendo Entertainment System had arrived by mail. For memory-test, it would verify all memory; after using all of its internal 4kb (?), it began on the game-cartridge which of course had not only memory but also registers and I/O to the addressbus. Of course the test failed; my colleague immediately began calling people and raised SIG_PANIC while I tried to explain to him this was not really RAM. But then why had I bought/recommended it? I don't know. The cartridge was not requested, at least not by me. But the phonecalls/panic/chaos continued before he would listen properly. This is so bloody typical. Also, I think the question of arriving late for work was discussed in a casual but not ha-ha-funny way.

I really need a holiday. And later, ...

...I was mountain-biking through a forest; a few meters in front of me rode a girl with well-shaped behind, laughing; I followed her. Also, somehow I got battery-holders for 2 small 1.5V 'button' cells. Life is great.

Date 2009-12-15

It was on a small island, maybe 100x100 meters in size, gras-covered hills. about 10-15 old ppl. playing golf.

One young guy was dressed in a cool way, dark sunglasses and talking on his cellphone, aparently complaining about why he was stuck on this island with the old ppl. Suddenly, one of the old ppl, a lady, have a spade in the ground and have found GOLD. She estimate the piece under the grass to be about 60cm long, 1-2 inch (yes, inch) thick. She also estimates its value to be 60 billion (thats ) (currency unknown, I assum DKR) Young cool guy and I argues and doubt it would be worth so much, but we recon it is a widely used "currency" for Guerrilla warfare groups around the world.

Suddenly, I am in a jungle, almost in the center of a military camp, ducking and hiding in the tall grass I try to not get notice by the guards on patrol. Last thing I remember was hurrying to the ground flat on my (not so flat) stomach, as a guard in VietCon style is close by, I see this in FPS style and I hold a piece of white toast in one hand (like the knife in the old Doom game would be)

Date 2010-02-11

Dream was split in to difrent dreams:

Part 1. I was on a beach, when something that had the shape and surface of a slug, yet it was pink in colour, about 2meters high and rotated 90degrees ccw (it stands up, okay!?) and the head was shaped like those underwater-dead-pirates from Pirates of the Caribian 2 (or 3?). They invaded the beach, each time they came to a person, they kind of fell over them, engulfing them and they too was to be come like one of those (who said matrix 2?) I saw this as a spectator on the beach and from a birds perspective, I was not part of it, just watching.

Turns out it was some kind of biological weapon designed by the great Satan (USA) and they would disappear after 11 min.

Part 2. I was driving to work, comming of the Autobahn, I guy from work is on the ramp, but in a electric wheelchair. The guy is know for not doing preventive maintenance btw. I stop ofcourse and it turns out his chair has run out of battery. It used D-cells and promise to go get some.

Near the ramp of the autobahn, was a DIY store, I go there. only to find no batteries. A sales clerk looking much like my sisterinlaw, about 1.6m, late 30's, big smile. EXCEPT this one also had a HUGE black mustage made from semi-thick rope comming from the nose.. She helps me finding batteries. Apperntly it is not something that is just off the shelf, but needs to be look up in a book containing pictures of diffrent DIY hardware, in the search for one that use D-cells. when going through the book there was a picture of a old danish disel train (a MY or MZ I belive) it was running through snow and it was blasting off it in 3-4 meters hight. Only thing odd about the picture, is that the ground around the tracks, was a green with grass and flowers snow was only on the train itself.

I never get back to they guy in the wheelchair. I find myself at work.

Date 2010-04-01

I was parked in the middle of a street, apparently, I was emptying a rather huge mailbox, at the size you post letters to, not a normal private one you receive letters in :-). A car was aproaching from the right, but street was wide enough for the car to pass. In the mail, there was a invite som something from a classmate I had not spoken to for the past 15 years, also I got a 80GB Seagate back from RMA \o/ was packed in a lovely looking anti-static bag.

Date 2010-04-03

It was winter and dark. I was at Gyro Gearloose place, he was to invent a machine for me so I could become invisible when activating he. He manage to do that (naturally). It had great resemblance to a electro-welding machine. I used it to go un-noticed into a attic of a house, but when I got up there, there was no normal wall outlet for it, only those twisted outlets for IT equipment that you can not put a normal schouko plug into. Needless to say, I was discovered. But now I was on the attic of my grandmother. Told her I was checking the roof for leaks so that water would not damage the insulation or ceiling in her living room. Concluded I would need some screws so went out to get them. Outside it was still dark and winter-like, not snowy, but cold and harsh. I was surprised my car was not there and saw my mother arrive by bus, waving. I quickly waved back and start walking to the DIY-store. On my way I passed the gas-station, a few young ppl (20ish) were standing there and in the pale light of the fluorescent light, I thought I saw an old mate of mine that I had not seen in 12 years. I did not stop but was called out for by another mate. I asked him about the first one but he did not know him. He told me that my dad and mother had borrowed the car and the left front wheel had blow, but they had already had it replaced. price: 10K DKR. I tried to tell him, he must be mistaken of the price, as I recall a new set (4..) of tiers had cost me about 3K4 DKR a year or 2 ago. But he insisted. We were now in a auto repair-shop. nobody was there and it was still dark. I showed him several tiers that cost only 400 DKR so surely it could not have costed 10K. We also looked at a Peogout car, it had a nice red colour but the model was all wrong, it was a 4-series but it was named "460" as if it was a Volvo.. Very strange. All of a sudden, my mate had found the screws I needed for the roof, yet I had not told him about it and we were still at the auto repair-shop.. anyway we went back.

I was now in a room I did not know, it was long and narrow, had a table and about 10 chairs, as if it was a lunch-room/container at a work-site. I was sitting there and my parents where there. I was very angry, my voice sounded like thunder, demanding to know how the fuck one tier could cost 10K !! at first the reason was it was including labour, but still it was insane. then it was because my dad had approached the mechanic directly instead of booking a time or make an appointment with the head of the repair-shop. bill from mechanic was 5K and then another 5K from the manager.. This was insane to (and it really is!) I now demanded to see the invoice from both the mechanic and the manager, this was not possible.

Suddenly it is a sunny day. I am outside in a huge parking lot, with a Dremel(tm) cutting in the C-column of a car much like mine, I was searching for some number on the inside, cutting off small pieces at the time (5x5cm or so) searching. All the while my quality manager at work were standing some 30meters away claiming it should be there..

Date 2010-04-10

I was a freelance reporter armed with a gun; there was some info-source who had made a meeting in a parking lot somewhere. Somehow I wind up there, and am in the back of a white van (my van?); sliding door opens, I pull my gun and slowly look/step out, and there is the info-source. He tells me of some Stalin-era soviet revival movement that is worth reporting about.

We go there somehow, and indeed, in the woods, many trucks with nuclear missiles being constructed/paraded around; lines and lines of pre-Stalin era russian soldiers in trenchcoat and with long rifles with long bayonet being produced from an assemlbly line in the sky or on a mountain (last bit of assembly line is a rail coming down from steep mountain side, but other assembly lines come from a gap in the mountains (the Path of the Dead, possibly). They behave drunk and savage, and start harassing and beating citizens (coming from another assembly line); at some point a soldier still hanging from his rail high above the ground tosses his rifle into a group of civilians (wood + bayonet + gravity + height = bad combo). Elsewhere, they are systematically torturing those opposing the regime. How nice.

A civilian or lower-rank soldier being harassed is told to pick up a ringing phone, but he apologises and says it's not his task and his superior officer should normally do that; soldier continues harassing and points up, and lo and behold, the place on the rail where the superior officer used to hang is empty, so "pick up the phone!", and eventually the guy does it; not sure if I am watching or I am actually that guy at that point.

Date 2010-05-12

A former guy I worked with 2-3 years back and saw again last week during a seminar, was in my dream:

He had written alot of Christmas cards but had no stamps. Yet he had a time machine.. I was beamed back to 17xx, and was meet buy one or 2 bankrobbers, they helped me break into a large vault. They got the gold, I got a bag of stamps. they were red and I was pussled by there value: 2.27DKR, was a bit high for a stamp in 17xx (it currently is 5.25DKR I believe). THINK I got back to pressent time, but not sure. They guy needing the stamps might have been on a metal ladder outside and it was dark...

Data 2010-05-16

I was playing the weekly national lottery, the numbers came on the screen but were in the wrong order, high->low rather than low->high as on my coupon. After working a bit on that, I discovered that I have 4 numbers right, with the price of 83DKR (11 Euro), Then I realize that not only I had the 4 numbers right, but also a 5th "extra" number right! My price was now a wooping 11K DKR (1477 Euro).

Then I woke up...

Authors note: I think this dream illustrates that I am modest guy.. or perhaps pessimistic, as the big price (7 numbers correct) has a price between 3 million and 10 million DKR ( 400K to 1.3M Euro).

Date 2010-06-18

Part 1: I am with at friend at a bar/pub. at first it seams to be outdoor and there is some shooting a few streets away, people are not too distressed. Then it is indoor, filled with people and I believe there is live music as well. My friend gets up, perhaps going to the bar to order something, and I follow shortly. He has a proposal for me: He and his baby-daughter is regularly going to public pool/water-land and ask me if I would go instead of his child, as the child not realy wants to, but if he and just one other goes there at least 15h/month, there is a free meal for both of us each time we go there.. I need to think about that.

We are about to go back to the table we left with our drinks (pepsi max :-) ), when the live music returns, I now see it is "Lis & Per" (Danish folk-music, only ppl over 50 listen to that, and me). I pass them only to find that our table have 2 other guests now: Keld & Hilda Heik (same shit, diffrent ppl). I go sit next to Hilda, with a mix of fear and excitement (no, not THAT kind of excitement.) The music does not realy start again, we are all solving crosswords instead..

Part 2: I am at what appears to be a StarGate, with an army of people who are about to invade another country/tribe. The army is pretty low-tech, dark-agei'sh.. I am not one of them, but I go with them. At the other side of the gate, they find that they are not on earth, but on the moon! This does not surprise me, and the lack of O2 does not bother me, they on the other hand, hurry into a large building of steel and glass. Once inside, they beg me redial the gate so they can go home. After some mocking by yours truly, I dial it and they hurry out and through it. Pleased to see them go, I stay behind and look at the earth, it is so pretty so very clear to see. Suddenly, what appears to be my dads old Mazda 626 drives into view, the license plate looks like the one he actually had, but I could not be 100% sure it was him in it. It drove past me, turning up they ash-like dust on the surface, and backed up near a small hill, meanwhile, I was trying to climb another hill to get a signal on my cellphone, but with no luck, I concluded that the line of sight I had to earth was not enugh, as the small portion of the total view that made out for the earth, was too small for the signal to be strong enough. The car had stopped and it turns out it was my father, he was apparently going to the dump with something (mind you, we were still on the moon) I started to explain about the StarGate and the invading forces, but he did not really want to know or care. He showed me his new phone, witch was Identical to mine, and complained about the charger was also the usb wire (as it is on his digi-cam (but it is not on my phone...).

Part 3: Sadly, I do not remember this part very good, except that I was at work, and a co-worker of mine showed my a book he had written and had the hole front covered in a very majestic picture of himself, looking very sophisticated.

Date 2010-06-21

I will use the "I can't remember it well" excuse on this one as well - I was walking around with a .45 or heavier revolver or pistol, shooting animals and people who (if smart) were running away from me. Careful aim and a single shot got rid of most of them; a liberal splash of blood could be seen where they were hit, after which they fell over. I remember at some points it was physically hard to squeeze the trigger, and also that there actually was a storyline which I forgot, unfortunately.

Date 2010-08-(25 give or take a few days)

I was in a kayak, on a fjord with tall (30-40meters) coal-gray rock-sides on both sides. paddling. I was going to a funeral in north Jutland, I was apparently not that far way but the landscape was that of Greenland or Norway. I was going to a funeral, the misses had gone in advance and we were to meet up at the church.

The water was calm, blank and dark. I was paddling with good spirit. I came to a sign much like this only it had a pictogram of man in kayak instead of a bike. it said 10km to Hobro, where I was going. Suddenly I could hear the sea, I was worried about it, because the kayak is not exactly made for crossing the big sea with waves'n'stuff, to my delight, the waves were OK. Now there is a time laps, as I do not remember sailing on the open sea, but only arriving in another fjord, this time with green hill-sides, there is a small patch with shallow water I need to cross before getting to the brink, I paddle with all my might and sweep across it, into the water again and onto the shore. I see now the ppl are moving into the church and close the door, before I can manage to get up there.

Next to the church, a old time well like this except for the ppl and the roof was of wood. There were a bench around it and I saw from the distance a 20ish sister-in-law was sitting there. Thought that I would go chat with her since I could not enter the church now. When approaching the well, she turns out to be a +80 year old woman of whom I do not know.


I was talking with a co-worker from a US office, he was calibrating there analog clock by the means of a little coffee-stained piece of paper, noting results randomly during the year and used the "results" for the next years calibration certificate. I pointed out to him that was not the way to do it. I wanted to show him how we did it, so I looked up a calibration certificate of our own, it had a nice excel-graph on the first page, very nice. On the 2nd page, it got a bit strange, it has a picture of the test setup for calibrating a clock it was as follows:

The clock was submerged in a round bell (like a cartoon fish bowl), filled with a liquid, this was in turn mounted on the steering of a full-blooded Harley Davidson bike (like in Terminator 2), this was driven by a Chimp dressed like a gypsy / Roma. It was suppose to drive Counter-earth rotation (so I am guessing west to east.

Due to this, I did not show the co-worker the certificate, it was just too silly.


Going to a LAN party, just a small one with a couple of friends. Had to take a boat to get there, it was a small yacht that was moored with the stern towards the peer (+10 points for maritime expressions), I went first, entered at center and walked along the narrow side at port side. the boat leaned a bit due to me coming aboard. My friend was to go next, and had at least 2 large suitcases (the old kind, no gay wheel things). He was a bit nervous about going onto the boat with both him and the weight of the luggage, as I was safely on-board, mocked him for this, as did the captain. The luggage came on first, then him, no sweat, boat did not tilt more than 20 degrees or so.

We are now at the LAN, I think it is in a sports arena but we are just 5-6 ppl. My friend from before want to show us all something really cool, but in order to do so, he need one who is level xxx in a fantasy game, that runs in google mail. No one else but him is out of us. I volunteer for levelling up so that he can show us.

He tells me (in English, strangely) to level up I need to repeat some daunting task over and over again (sounds like WOW? :) ) until Friday. But... it is Friday today I say, will this take a hole week?? Sadly. yes, unless I go out on a quest that is somewhat dangerous (okay.. this truly sounds like WOW :-( ).

Not feeling up to spending a hole week, I decide to take up the challenge. First, we, he and I, needs to go far up on a mountain side, for this, a rather big bird takes me in its mouth, fly me up there and release me.. fine, now this is turned to 3rd perspective, and I look like Bart Simpson. My friend is there, but I can not see who he looks like. we are standing in what could best be described as a balcony on the cliff-side on this mountain, the rock are dark gray with no plant life what so ever, or snow for that matter. The big bird is still there, it is sitting on the edge of this balcony. My friend tells me, that I must follow the path to the right that goes along the mountain side. While he tells me this, I notice the bird, now very much resemble a pelican, has a 1/2" iron tube, like the ones used for freshwater installations in houses, and a about 20 cm diameter plastic hose (the ones that fold like a harmonica, used for venting air from dryers and hood over the stove ), anyway, perspective have now switch back to first person.

I set off on this journey on the small moss and grass covered path, about 20 meters in front of me is somebody else, looks like Snufkin from Moomin (The one with a with a pointy hat. just behind her and a bit up in the air, is a small (10 x 10 cm) storm-cloud, that sucks something into it like a black hole, and each time it gives off a small flash inside it. After following the path for some time, I come to the entrance of a castle, not the main entrance with a huge gate and all that, but the path just goes into the side of it, near the top, remember his is a cliff-side. Inside, it is warm a cossy, the path now being hallways that twist and turn, going a few steps up and down, there is books everywhere on the walls, from time to time the path splits up, but I can feel what way is the right to go, when I select a way, I can instatly feel if it is right or one, I say this out loud as if I was a narritor on a documentary..

08:30, alarm clock wakes me, I wonder If I did level up and if it was worth it to see on my mates pc.


At first, It was like seeing a interview on the tv, but with extreem close-up, I could only see about half of the face of a youngish (late 20's) man. He had what appears scares in his face and was a bit junkie-like. The man was telling about why here was there and how they helped him, the camera zoomed out slowly and it become clear to me that he was strapped into some kind of bed, like on a mental institute. There was several wires hooked up to his face, I could not make it out what it was. Suddenly I was there, at was a 4-5 man room, or atleast had beds for it, the guy next to the one on the interview was not as strapped in, he was lying on his back and a nurse was sitting on the bed, with a crossword she was going, on his back.

The first guy was talking to me, telling me how much help he got here, I was interrupted from time to time by a nurse that lowered a steel probe down his throat(1), apparently it was part of the treatment. He smiled and continued after each time, yet he did look in a lot of pain each time it happened. He has a beard like Hagrid (Big fella in Harry Potter movies), may be not as long, but tied up in small tails and taped to the equipment, like if it was pulling it. A 3rd guy comes in, and lays down on a available bed, as if he walked in from the street.

It now becomes clear to me, they are all there because they have a mental illness that makes them obsessed with there own beard! A 4th guy comes in, but there is no bed available, only a mechanical setup for doing whatever they do to the poor fellas, it is a H shaped structure, about 2 meters tall and 1 meter wide,but the bed is gone. the guy sits down on a emulated-grass-carpet, and slides himself under the H-shaped structure, again and again. A older woman is sitting on a bed in the distance, surely she does not have a beard obsession? no, she is reading a magazine..

Everything changes, the room is the same, but now I am at work, but the layout does not really fit, but I am sure it is a work, it looks like it, and there is an engineer from work there too + about 5-6 people he was apparently having a seminar for, I do not know what he is telling them or training them in, but one guy wanders off and I follow him, he is not allowed to leave the room. he goes down a staircase and through a door, I catch up with him and tells him he must go back up, he agrees and takes a thermocouple with him.

Back up at the "class-room", The topic seams to have shifted from whatever it was, to planing where to go out and get drunk. One guy is allready semi-puking in a corner, as they are all drinking some thin milk like substance (Barcardi? I have no clue) from long (15-20 cm) lab tubes. I excuse myself as I do not drink. The engineer recommends we all go down to the "rabbit", a pub I guess.

I woke up, got shaved and went to work :-)

(1), no, nothing sexual, I guess this comes from I was setting up a PT100 sensor in steel housing here at home last night.


Ok, this one pales in comparison with above LSD'esque stories, but ok.

I was on ground floor if some building; not sure if it had 1st floor, but it had a basement. I was taking/testing single board computers, and had to climb/descend the stairs between ground and basement a lot, thinking "hmmm, this is not ideal work", and then, "but it's only temporarily and better than it was". (Oh, the parallels with real life.)

I had one item in my hand and came up the stairs, when looking through one of the windows which reached all the way down to the floor, I saw the nearby swimming pool/beach; this house was built close to the pool. (Pool didn't belong to the house.) There I saw a mid-aged lady with black wavy hair and flower-powery yet not overly coloured dress/sheet was actually walking on top of the water. I thought to myself that that was very weird; no ripple in the water or anything. Then I thought of the depth of the water there, and since kiddos swim there, it's not very deep. I looked again, and indeed she was walking through the water now, ankle-deep.

After the lady had passed and I wanted to get back to my work, I saw another lady, this one dressed in very revealing red underwear/bathingsuit, rolling in the shallow water, and since it was very nice to look at, I stayed there a bit to watch.

So anyway, now all kinds of kids aged 5..10 (or so) were standing outside the house, laughing, looking in through the windows-until-the-floor, and shouting and screaming and what not, and running all about the place (outside). I spotted a table near the window with a chair between table and window and considered sitting down there with my board and datasheet to have "a nice read", but in the end didn't, because I didn't want to turn my back against these kids in case they tossed a brick through the window or whatever, so went to sit down somewhere else.

At that moment, a whole bunch of shouting laughing kids came in through the door, some chubby bigger kid in front, looking serious. I mentioned that "there's the door", but chubby boy didn't move and ignored me, so I thought ok, and punched him in the stomach. Hitting someone inside a dream never went well for me (lack of p0wah), and inside this dream I actually told myself this, and also that if I just continued to hit, it would soon go better. So I continued, first it went not so good, but at the end chubby boy wished he hadn't come in.

And then I woke up. Where are the aliens now?


I was boarding a plane, I had a seat in the first 1/4 of the plane, a bit strange but I prefer to sit further back, at the centre emergency exit due to the extra leg-space. A airline steward approached me once I got seated, telling me I could not sit there. I asked him why but he could not say, just repeated that I could not sit there. I showed him my boarding card and that I was in the right seat, further more I told him I checked in on-line and it said that this was the seat row with extra leg-space, and it had extra space. The steward left and we were about to take off.

Take-off! pushed back in the seat, the plane started to lift its nose, but we were going over the normal 45 degree angel, suddenly we where at 70 degrees! Then it went to 90 degrees and flipped over, I now see this from the outside, the plane went on its back and then straight down, only to turn up again to gain more altitude. This was repeated once more.

The Captain came on the speakers, saying that we had to do that to gain enough altitude without going to far horizontal. The flipping over and going down was to gain momentum / speed to go up.. I sat back in my seat, thinking that it could not possible work that way, the energy gained buy dropping, is used before reaching the same hight again...


Strangely, this dream is about flying to, sort of. Nothing spectacular about the dream, except it shows 2 clear things: relation between what has recently happend and what is going on with the dreamers body:

I was at an airport terminal, waiting. Just as they started boarding, I realized a toilet trip was in order. Quickly going around the place searching for a toilet. I find very narrow door made out of plastic, just like the ones there is on the plane, sight, the main reason I wanted to go before takeoff, was to use a real toilet with space, not a 0.5 x 0.5 m room.

Oppone opening the narrow door, I find to my suprise a room about 6 x 6 meters with normal size doors all the way around with toiletbooths, this is very strange, as I went around this wall / room when I went from the gate to the door, and it was no more than 2 to 3 meters thick.. Anyway, it is buisness time!, damn. all booth's seams to be ocupied, the little red dot at the door handle is showing.. Someone else enters, goes streight to one of the ocupied booths and enter, okay.. indicator system must be faulty (on all doors..), lets see whats behind door no. 1, its open and empty, neat.

I wake up, realizing I got to go do a Austin 'danger' Powers after defrost-process. Furthermore we do at work have a problem with the indicator at the handles and I saw a tribute to Dr. Who on youtube last night...


First, I was at work and very tired. Coworker and me were working on a audio amplifier driving a transformer to make an AC current-source. I had, for unknown reasons, looked inside the ready-made amp and found a transistor that had no function, so soldered the B-E pins together (it was a TO-92 placed high on the PCB, plenty of pin length).

We powered it up and found that there were high distortion on the signal, in fact, the signal started out as out scale on the scope, and when turning the input signal down, the positive part of the sine was fine, but the bottom part was real mess of RF. I told coworker about the transistor and could not explain why I did it. Wrapped a long screwdriver in TP to insulate it, and started to unscrew the amp while it was still powered on, then we decided to switch it off and open her up to remove my error. I never got to see the result, as the following happened:

I am at an ye-old-times fair, It is a warm but not too warm sunny day. The grass is green and people are happy. Some 50 meters away, an 13th hundred small castle fence, you know the ones with wood logs vertical side by side, sharp at the top. Over this fence, parts of horses are sling-shoot over, landing on the green grass in front of it. Not all shots are just parts of (dead..) horses, some are hole living horses, that fell hard to the ground, does not get up, just lies there, trying to breath, and as I can imagine, in serious pain.

Going around the fence, I find the man guilty of those acts, he is standing at a enormous slingshot,taking horses from behind him, putting them in the sling and fires them over the fence. Addressing him with the wrongness of his acts is not something he agrees with, but after some persuasion and his arm twisted around his back, we come to an agreement. We go out outside the fence and I start looking for some cops to arrest him for animal abuse. Sadly, the 2 cops I find are reluctant to arrest the man I am still holding on to, as the need to speak with there boss first. To our luck, we can contact said boss, whom is on holiday in Spain, By the help of a SqueezeBox, we get a OK from him and the animal abuser is taken away.


Just like in the movie "Groundhog Day" with Bill Muarry, I was trapped in the same day over and over again. Each day/time, I would rob a bank, drive away with the loot as the police came, every once in a while they realized on that it was me who robbed the bank, but they never caught me, the getaway was done in my old Nissan Primera (R.I.P).

The personnel in the bank was VERY cooperative, even helpful. Sometimes it would be very foggy in the bank (tear-gas? I don't know) and they would tell me where on the counter the money was and where the exit was. I love a bank with good service!. The guard in the bank never interfered, he just stood close to me and watched what was going on, sometimes with a paper-mask covering his mouth and nose, no idea why.

Note: I did see a poster for the movie "Groundhog Day" yesterday, but I have no clue about the rest.


I was at a course/training in US, standard class-room training, one guy, itallian I think, complained to the teacher, that his clients could not understand that a capacitor with a higher voltage than another capacitor with lower voltage and same capacity, had more energy, this was descussed somewhat, more than I cared for.

Lunch-break, we were moving as a group to the cafeteria-area, one of the people in the group told me he spend a lot of time on Bornholm but when I spoke in Bornholmsk to him, he did not understand anything, but somebody behind me, I dont know who, presumably one of the locals as we were now in the cafeteria, replied in my native language.

Standing in the long line for foodz, first there were plastic cups, this part of the line was semi-outside, I could feel the wind as I climbed up on the counter to reach in for the cups, they were placed far in and in a grove in a plate, making them flush to the surface and hard to get to. I removed a few cups, one for me and for the first couple of ppl in line after me, many of them were quite short (less than 1.6m) and had no change in getting to the cups.

Moving on, we were getting to the foods section, the place was made up of S-shaped lines where one could look through glass over to the next side, were there were all kinds of meat. One guy behind me, lets call him Fritz, pointed out there were cinnamon rolls, yet I could not see them. When we got around to the meat it was almost gone, there were but a few pieces left, and not anything exciting. Upon getting to the checkout, the large AA lady behind the counter was very upset as she was closing and we could not pay. We were directed to go to the cafeteria above us, and was pointed towards the elevator.

We were but 4 people in the elevator, one knew where we were going. The elevator started, we must have been at the ground-floor or close to it when it started, but quickly the display read "25", "50" and finally "104". We got out, there were no ppl. around, but apparently we knew where we were going.

Suddenly, a big black and gray cat, as tall as the room itself, I estimate it to be about 3.5 meters tall and for normal proportions. It was very cuddly albeit it did show its enormous teeth's. I stroke it a few times while the rest kept there distance. Now, our "guide" was not sure where we were going, to our luck there were a guy standing at the wall, looking a bit suspicious, like the Hunchback of Notre-Dame... Well, he could help us, he open a secret passage in the wall, behind it was a medium-sized swimming-pool, were were pushed into it and by magic found our-self back at the cafeteria we first went to, but now 10-15 min earlier. (swimming-pools-time-machines are common, no?)

All 4 of us rushed to the line, hurrying to grab foodz and move on before they closed again. upon reaching the check-out, I paid with my visa and was asked if "this was sufficiently padded?" I assumed she meant if there was enough money to cover the meals, so I said yes. Now, I am not completely clear on what happened next, but it was as if the visa card was tossed by the lady onto the floor next to us and it turned into a small car, that was then pushed off the edge ( we were apparently on x floor and there was no guard-rail or windows to that side) and off the edge it went. People started screaming but the lady assured everybody that she asked if it was sufficiently padded and that I had said yes...

As if nothing happened, things returned to normal and the stuff on my tray and the others was about to be ring'ed in. One would assume this was to be done either by bar-codes or by memory of item codes by the lady, but no. they had a small pig (think "Babe" movie) that went around on the tray, sniffing and sampling what was on it, to determine price.. hmm.. damn pig ate most of what I had on the plate, only had half-a-slice of toast with a fried egg on it, hardly a dinner..

Now, the observant reader would recall the obtaining of the cups, there were never filled, as there was no jugs or machines to fill from. This turned out to be another line we went to and this processed fairly smooth, as our guide said "The know how to make Cola in the US" being very proud and 'merican and all...


I was leaving a bit too late from work, going to dinner+le movies with friends. Before going to my friends, it was already dark, but in summer so still warm, I need to go to a place on the way, to pick up a new shirt. it is out in the open, in a back ally with many small mobile-shops setups.

I was surprised to see I had some of my own clothes there as well, have been wondering where my T-shirts were, apparently they were here.. Found the shirt I wanted (was nice btw.) and the lady who was running the store was trying to ring it up on the cash register but could not figure it out. I was getting impatient as I was getting more and more late. She got help from the "store" next to her, and she finally made it work. Told her I would swing by later this evening and pickup my T-shirts.

Next problem: I did not know where I was, a bit strange since I been there before but hey.. Asked her to show me on a map where in Copenhagen we were, she could not, I got a bit impatience again, time was running out. One of my friends where calling me on my phone, that is, on the handheld phone from work, those things don't work outside the office, but never the less. He was worried as they were sitting down for dinner at the restaurant and I wasn't there yet.

I got a general idea/overview from the map and started running (right...) suddenly there was somebody with me, looked like Dobby from Harry Potter movies. We were running through 2-door ports that was connecting one Chinese restaurant to the one next to it, this was not the main entrance but kind of in the middle of each restaurant, going in and looking to the right one could see the street entrance. We somehow knew that the dinner we / I was going to was in a Chinese restaurant and my friends should be there, each restaurant we ran through was empty, not only were there no guests, but also no tables or chairs.

Suddenly, "Dobby" gets hit and have a limp, he was getting slower and slower, we ran and ran as fast as we could, the straight connections between Chinese restaurants were becoming neck-breaking parkur-like runs over house-tops, slipping and sliding on the somewhat flat roofs. "Dobby" was getting worse, we drop down onto a walkway along a long building with many apartments (and all accessed from this external walkway). "Dobby" was dying, the ppl. living in the apartment knew who he was, apparently he was a bit like Yoda for this clan/family. We put him on a very rude made stretcher and semi-ran along the walkway. Somebody from another apartment spotted us and saw "Dobby"/"Yoda" was dead, this would mean the end for the clan and we were followed / hunted by this guy, avoiding drain-pipes on the walkway so they would not catch the stretcher and bring us to a halt.

Dream ended about here, never made it to my friends / dinner / le movie. I am infact going to dinner+le movies (Star Trek: Into Darkness) on friday, apart from that, the rest is a bit FUBAR.


I believe this may have been inspired by watching the old Pinky And The Brain intro on youtube..

Was on a spaceship, very Gray ( not gay ) and steel all around. Apparently some kind of Acid monster/entity was on the loose. Crew was trying to run from it and seal it in. A blast door was activated, trapping it but only for a few moments. I should perhaps mention that the acid was not a sluggish green thick goo like in "Alien" but rather a bright pink mixed up with a few other bright colours in the same end of the spectrum ( still not gay ).

The Acid was now in a corridor, a very long and very very tall one. I see some of the crew was strapped in the acid, cartoonish skeletons was all that was left in the rising Acid as it was expanding slowly but with the fluid moving very quickly over its own surface. Nothing could stop it.

Then things changed a bit, I was now no longer observing what was going on, I was part of it, somebody else and me was going into the acid, I think we had no other choice since we were trapped in the corridor with the rising acid. It was not filling as such from below and up, it was on the walls all the way up, then slowly closing in on the bottom, kind of like the garbage scene in Star Wars. Somehow we were going upwards in the Acid, and at the very top now, it had changed into a more rubbery consistency, almost like a balloon or a jumping-castle in a bright orange colour. We were trying to get out, when my mate got the idea, inspired by the concept of a well-used sofa: There has to be parts that is compressed that we could slip down through and on to the other side ( apparently, the one wall of the corridor was no longer there.. ) And so we did.

The Acid is now back to the pink fluid again, moving rapidly across its own surface but expanding slowly. We, my mate and I, are in a small hallway next to it, trying to build a itzi bitzi "dam" of some white powder that has a very high pH value, the idea is of course it will neutralize the acid and bring it to a stop. I called it a dam, it may be a abuse of the term, it was merely 1-2 cm high at max, and 1 cm wide, across the hallway into what used to be a corridor.

At first, it looked like it was working, but lo and behold, the Acid started to jump over the dam in small portions at the size of the dam, this was indeed a loosing battle.

I woke up, facing the alarm clock, the red 7-segments showed 5:55, I went back to sleep.


It has been awhile, hasn't it?

Last nights dream: I was in a class-room, no clue who the teacher was, nor the other students.

The topic was gravity, 9.8 m/s2 ( yes, this bugs me too ). A young lady next to me was struggling with the concept of gravity. Now, I am on the moon, standing next to a road light-pole ( but no road ), the young lady can see me from earth, and I her, strangely.

I was on the phone with her as well, asking if she could see me. I was not wearing a space-suit, but apparently me breath was strong enough to cause vibration in the phones microphone and I had no problem with the 0 Bar abs(pressure). As she could see me, I jumped up, 3-4 meters along the light-pole and slowly drifted downwards again.

Have no idea if the demonstration worked for her, as I woke up.


This first part took place in 3rd person, like a movie:

People are going to a sport-event, mainly dressed in the colours of either team. One guy( Team A fan ) is turns back and feel threaten by another guy rooting for the opposite team ( Team B ). A gang of fans of team B see this and stops Team A guy on his way out, offering him to sit between them and no harm will come to him. nice guys, beside sport-fans.

Now, this switches more or less to 1st person view, I think Team A guy still left and Team B guys followed him to persuade him it was OK, but I am not entirely sure, for the sake of sanity. lets say it was so.

Team A guy is either a train or on a train / locomotive in a big switch-yard with lots of tracks. He seems either lost or out of fuel. I am on another train with other people, trying to help him, guiding him back. highlighting what switch-points he must go through to get out. It is highlighted slightly TRON style, but not quite, more like just lights and numbers at each point.

This does not help, he cannot move, we start moving back to get him and find ourself not being able to move any more as well, our cooling-system, same as aircon or your average fridge with compressor, is not working any more. I set out to walk along the track, finding spare parts and gas for the aircon system. This is no longer a big switch-yeard but I walk along a cornfield and come up to a small settlement of new houses, but this is no help, because for some insane reason, they use compressed air instead of R404a that we need..